NOT the MotoGP News: Yellow Submarine

 In News, NOT The MotoGP News


We wait all summer for a race, and then they come along like buses; just when you think you had time for a breather, the oxygen masks drop down from the overhead locker of life. The tiny gap from Silverstone to Misano left little room for sensible chat from the social media accounts of some teams, so we suffered the “race” from Silverstone to Misano. Actually some of the pictures the teams posted reminded us more of Cliff Richard’s seminal artwork, the film Summer Holiday.

Silverstone is like some big old disused airfield from the Second World War (surprisingly, that’s just what it is you oaf – Ed). Misano however is the opposite as far as space is concerned, but a lot more expensive. Yes prices for entry to Misano got a kicking on BitSpurt. The track is an illustration of how property developers can build 200 houses on your old school playing field – talk about crow-barring a circuit into a broom cupboard. All the money for building the track seemed to disappear elsewhere in that funny Italian way, so the track was built with little or no run-off. No worries, or more likely “nessum problema,” as the local mayor no doubt said, “we’ll run all races the other way around the track.” And amazingly they do, and somehow the corner run-off is much better. We tried to get a statement from the mayor (at the time of the construction) but no one could reach him on his €100m super yacht somewhere off Barbados. Unfathomable. (One nautical pun is one too many. Write about the races – Ed)

Moto 3 was brilliant on a track built for Moto3. Unfortunately nifty Bo’selecta who did so well at Silverstone confirmed all theories about doing well in one race and doing not so well at the next one, by falling off on the first lap. Lay off the Amsterdam cigars Bo? The race it self was a re-run of just about every other Moto3 race this season, being utterly mad, ruthless and entertaining. Binned-her is the outstanding rider of the season in the class, and although we’d like to prick his bubble we can’t without resorting to being cruel about the number of teeth he has in his mouth. 32? Are you sure? And we’re nothing if not cruel. So we wont.

One rider who won’t be thanking the former mayor is Quartararo; running off track and gaining advantage cost Quart-pint a six place drop during the race. However that didn’t diminish the spectacle of racing anywhere. Its all got a bit on the edge to be honest with mistakes being made by everyone, yet at the same time there were some wonderful bits of racing thrown in. Being on the edge doesn’t suit everyone, and Navaho Navarro did it again – he fell and lost points and no doubt the slim chance at the championship he had. Quart-pint also ran wide yet again and had to drop another place! Boy, did he not like this track. And then to prove how naggery Misano is Mir did the same – ran wide, and was penalised a position.

Brad kept his head, and towards the final laps, he and Bastardsurnametospell edged ahead from the howling pack. Binned-her by a gnat’s took the win. Brad has pretty much got the championship in the bag. We hope he wears a gum shield.

Maybe all Moto2 races should be run at Misano. For once the ginger step-child of the series produced entertainment. That’s pretty hard for us to type here in the office, but credit where credit is due.

After Silverstone Zarco wasn’t talking about that incident, and Lowes looked like he wanted to have a fight with anyone and everyone on track. This is eminently better than being nice to each other. Zarco was a hot head once but someone calmed him down to the point that he (and maybe Tom Luthi) looks like he lives in a Buddhist monastery between races. This is bad. Moto2 appears to be the only series without a bit of a grudge in the mix on track, so any that we can find and exaggerate is good news. If Sam Lowes was a dog (WHAT?!?!- Ed) he’d be a Jack Russell, having pop at everyone, with no quarter asked nor given. He’s not though, and he fell off. But not before trying so hard that he left the mother of all tyre marks up the fairing of Morbidelli’s bike. This is what we want! Saves on Christmas cards at the end of the year. Indeed Morbidelli looked like he was keen to race everybody who he got near or who got near him. Give him a pay rise! World Champ and now a bit of a chump at Keifer, Kent fell off; its not going well, and his team mate Olivera has escaped to KTM for next season. Kent has a bit of an excuse whereas Alex Marquez doesn’t; he really is struggling, and I’m not sure his dad owns a jewellers emporium.

We haven’t spoken about Lorenzo Badass. Like Morbidelli, this guy knows how to race and look like an old school racer too. All weekend Badass hoiked his bike around the track and only in Warm Up was he outside the top 4. Alex Rins was still suffering from the daftly-incurred shoulder injury, but rode like the god he is when not painting in and around south Essex. He and Badass made the break that Moto2 often doesn’t give us. And in the end Badass had the fitness and pace to drop Rins. If you look at the final times for Moto2, you’d be forgiven for thinking it was a typical Moto2 race – long gaps between everyone with little racing. Not so this time, and if only it would last to the end of the season. It won’t.

Then you get to this thing of Rossi and Misano and his “home” track. Although Mugello is his preferred track in Italy to race on. Like the sun and the moon, like yin and yang, like Led Zep and One Direction there is good and bad in this universe. Rossi with is racing hat on is mostly (yep, mostly) good. Rossi wearing someone else’s marketing/PR/money making hat is mostly annoying. But that tax bill was massive and must have drained his accounts a bit.

So Misano off the track looks like one big money making exercise. On the track Pedrosa looked a million dollars. And what’s more, no one noticed him all weekend. He and Lorenzo have had a dreaful season for the same reasons – they haven’t engaged us as their managers. No – sorry, the Michelin front tyre doesn’t suit them. But this weekend The Fat Tyre Man brought a new tyre, and boy did Pedrosa like it. That’s the explanation or the other one is that HRC kidnapped Dani for R&D work in Japan and replaced his with that Honda robot ASIMO, returning Dani for Misano.

Rossi looked great, as did Lorenzo, though Jorge did look a bit daft after the race moaning about overtakes by Vale. Viñales did the “I won a race, and now it’s a bit weird at the next race” thing and was a bit weird. And Marc Marquez did that thing where he gained points in the bag and made his brother look more overrated.

That all sounds a bit brief for the main race. The sun did shine, the crowds did look and sound amazing, and the crowds and the riders did make a spectacle.

But we are overjoyed at Dani Pedrosa wining. Without sounding like everyone else, Pedrosa is a great person. He may have kept a factory ride longer than some think is right, but he does win races and he does help make HRC one of the top teams they are. Who could replace Pedrosa at Honda Repsol? Six riders no doubt. But still win at least one race every year? Year after year? None.

There. We’ve got all serious, and you don’t read this far to read serious stuff.

Five races left. Europe – flyaway – flyaway – flyaway – Europe. (Dani is good at Aragón by the way)

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