NOT the MotoGP News – #FrenchGP – Try to can the Can Can* Down in sweet Le Mans

 In NOT The MotoGP News

Just as there aren’t Nine Million Bicycles in Beijing, neither were there a couple hundred thousand of spectators at Le Mans even though, apparently it was (according to the script I’m reading), “a HISTORIC moment in Grand Prix history”.  Which does sound like a tautology or something, but not an oxymoron (I’ll be the judge of that – Ed).

The Le Mans MotoGP circuit is so French it’s named after an Italian car manufacturer that’s now owned by a German company who also own Ducati.  That, folks is serendipity.  But boy does it know how to rock! And put on some amazing racing.  Stick into that formula two home riders and flick the switch.  Quite literally “Grand” and “Prix”.

Hot and sunny, the Shark Nando Grand Prix de France did not disappoint. Marc was back after taking even more time off.  We’ll be calling him “Sicknote” soon.  And he led the race for a while too – him and Jackeroo Miller for the first two laps were just the amuse bouche, with Pecco behind in third chasing hard.  The first quarter of the race did look like a Moto3 race on steroids as the front group of 7 jostled and nudged for advantage, whilst ageing porn star look-alike Danilo Petrucci was in 18th making lots of people wish he was still a fixture in the paddock.

And then.  And then it all went a lot Pete Tong banging a gong whilst smoking a bong, i.e., “wrong”.  Viñales is on a good bike.  In fact, he’s beginning to look the better of the two Aprilia riders; he’s actually prepared to fight and slug it out for a position.  Possibly for the first time in his career.  This week however, he didn’t need to rely on a chain braking to cop an early shower, he just had to have a coming together with the championship leader, Bagnaia.  Who’s fault was it?  No ones.  Who cares? Thewy do.  So it did all get a little primary school in the gravel.  Our money was on Mav carrying a shank down the side of his boot.  Thirty seconds or less later, there was a proper scare.  Alex “the faster” took Luca “the younger” out in a “there but for the grace of god” moment.  

At the front Bez nerfed Marc wide, received a penalty to drop a place, and then set about winning.  Zarco, with the aid of a few hundred thousand (just saying) spectators, who’d by now forgotten about Fabio Q, was feeling the benefits of all that garlic support, and was motoring up the points.  

With so many already out of the race, Mir thought he’d had enough and dumped it on lap 14.  You’d possibly get the RCV tried for murder, its killed so many careers.  More on this later.  By now Jackeroo was struggling and had slid from leading to sixth.  Then the Honda charge sheet racked up another victim; Rins. 

Unmentioned Jorge Martin(e) had spent most of the race at the sharp end and started to hassle Marc for 2nd place.  Most definitely the battle of the race until Honda notched another victim (Marc) who low-sided at turn 7 with one and a half laps to go.  Also out was Jackeroo a lap earlier.

Bez won by a country kilometre (it is after all a race in France). Martin(e) had just passed Marc for second when Marc crashed which meant Frenchie Zarco rightfully grabbed a podium spot!  Allez! Only 12 others finished which meant every finisher got a point including DANILO SCORED POINTS!  BOOM!

*Absolutely ripped off from Suzi Quatro (not to be confused with Suzi Perry who is awesome too).

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